It's hard to get up in the morning. There's nothing to look forward to anymore. Not even the stress of school to bum me out. At least it was something. But no, if I were in school I'd really be hard-pressed. I wouldn't have seen Nobuko almost every day for a week and I wouldn't have gotten together with Kevin to perform at the coffeehouse.
The days have no meaning and the world around me has no substance. I don't care about anything anymore. I still have my humanity and I still feel, but nothing has relevant essence anymore. Anything could happen in my life and I don't think I would care.
Diem, Luyen, Shiho, Madoka, Valerie. It feels like they've all gone away with Amina. As if the meaning they had in my life were attached to her being in my life. Now that she's gone, so are all of them. All gone to do their own thing and go their own way. I wonder if I could have kept Shiho if I had tried.
