Something’s wrong. I’m back at my apartment in Oberlin.
Myung is gone - academic suspension. It wasn’t his fault, he had to go through a lot, and the only reason he got canned was because one petty professor refused to cut him slack. He was a white East Asian Studies professor and Myung had made noise about why there are no classes on Korea in the East Asian Studies department. He also made noise over why all the professors in the EAS department are white.
I wish I had appreciated him more. I had all these preconceptions of him and I looked down on him. I didn’t want to be his friend, so we were cordial housemates and we kept our distance. But by the end of last semester I realized what a great person he is and what a great friend he should be.
I looked down on him because he had lived in Asia House and liked it, he was moneyed and had high tastes, superficial. Superficial stuff, though. He is also strongly principled, a loyal friend, always willing to help, intelligent, humble.
Adding to the academic pressure last semester, he met his natural mother for the first time in his memory. After he was born, his parents separated and his father prohibited her from having contact with him. Finally, last semester his father decided it was OK for them to meet and gave him her address - in Tenafly, NJ! So that drama played out last semester, fortunately they got along great, but it still was a lot to go through. I’ll be living alone with Myung gone.
I swear I felt a presence when I walked in the door. Maybe a ghost has been here while I was gone. I drove all night with Wendell and Lisa. We arrived in the morning with the sun bright and cold in the sky. Ohio looked frozen. I dropped those two off at their homes, delivered Bi-khim’s computer to her dorm room, and then drove here. I swung open the door, walked in, felt a presence, and then closed the door.
I don’t want to do anything. I don’t want to be a part of anything. I’m glad to have this apartment to myself. I can shut out and shut off. I needed to get away from New Jersey. I had a fight with the ‘rents on Friday night. They were so fucking rude and made it clear that I’m not a part of that family. Neither my friends or I am welcome in that house. Then they used their favorite tactic to resolve the fight: pretend it never happened. Idiots. They are nothing to me and I owe them nothing. The whole time I’ve lived in their houses? It never happened.
