Being let down, being hurt, being betrayed are not considerations when you truly fall in love. That’s what it means to have no defenses up. It didn’t matter that I was let down, hurt, and betrayed by Amina. I still loved her.
I struggle with existence, I try to detach, I try to realize that I cannot take anything as I sense it. I am not here. But then what are these senses? What are these feelings? Why do I do what I do - confined in a body and reality that I know is not real. I know it, but I do not feel it. It is not true knowledge. I am an arrow and I have missed the target before I even have been shot. I’m still too much of this world. I’m still far, far from my goal.
